Grief, Blame, Shame and Embarrassment

Michele SfakianosUncategorizedLeave a Comment

Dealing with Dyslexic Children – Guilt versus Shame

In my life I have learned that grief is an emotional force that cannot be controlled or predicted. It comes and goes on its own terms. Grief does not obey your plans or your wishes. It will do what it wants to you whenever it wants.

Grief has a lot to do with love and can change the very fabric of your life, even love. For a dyslexic mom, it can come any time. It is not something you can control. All you

can do is accept the grief, understand it and be aware of the consequences. To resist, is to prolong the grief. It has been said that it’s the price you pay for the love you have for your dyslexic child.

Mommy, why do I often feel embarrassed? For some moms, it can be a great relief to know your child’s diagnosis, while for other moms the label only serves to stigmatize them.

An accurate diagnosis of the difficulties is often unavailable for many and they feel a sense of shame, because of social anxiety, frustration and an absence of understanding of others!

In my life experiences, almost all children with dyslexia suffer from some guilt because they are “different.” Guilt is one of the most powerful negative emotions. When experienced on a regular basis guilt can quickly turn to shame.

The very idea of shame is so embarrassing that most people do not even want to talk about it. Many moms argue that having a dyslexic child can lead to much guilt and worry for the mother. She may feel that it was her fault that her child was born “that way”.

Shame has been observed not only in those who struggle to read, but also to spell and write. In addition to shame, children frequently experience humiliation and embarrassment when they are young. All of these negative emotions affect self-esteem.

For more on Guilt and Shame for the Dyslexic: Purchase your copy of Dyslexics are Orchids, Mothers are Gardeners on Amazon.

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